From Bruce Brodeen

I am really torn here – to post or not to post, to let a troubling shocking ‘revelation’ pass by undisturbed in the busyness of another day of making a living on internet – torn about meddling into the affairs of others, wondering how I would react in the same situation? Such are the gray areas we live in.

To post when I uncertain as the details on the proverbial ‘other side of the story’.

Then realizing the passage of time since this plea started and at how few comments from ‘business associates’ or customers of Dave’s have posted…I’m sure some of the reason above are for that.


Here I go – and pray that is God doing most of the compelling and not myself. I will sit on this before hitting ‘send’, praying it will be Him that guide movement or pull back and delete it. I will say this, if I hit ‘send’, I will sign my full name – and stand behind what I will type, for better or worse. Speaking only for me, too many anonymous postings commend not enough authority…

Okay. Take it for what you will – this letter is to Dave and his family and close friends.

Anthony: The criticism you have encountered for this tactic, I can only begin to imagine. You Christmas Eve video had me in tears and, before it was finished, in focused prayer I have not felt in months. On a personal note, I guess I should thank you for that encounter but am saddened by its trigger(we love to talk about ‘triggers’ in the realms of business and marketing). You stepped out into dangerous territory – very precarious territory – but your courage to do so (clearly) knowing full well its implications and doing it despite, is…a powerful display of a love that endures and is connected to our Creator.

A brother…a *big*, big brother. I wish I had one like you but that’s another story. I understand why others have a problem with this blog and how you’ve gone about things. I don’t. I greatly respect and admire the strength of your love. Wow.

Dave’s got a soul and we fight those, yes? And it’s just not pretty, so many times.

Alison: What does a stranger like me say to woman in your circumstance that others have not already presented after so much time has passed since this started? I’ll try – and be short. God is still in all this and will make it His own – in ways and weaves in the fabric of life we, mostly, will never understand. It’s just the way it always has been. Bad things happen to good people since the beginning of time and much worse happen to others – every hour of every day inside the blessings of our lives.

You know this, of course. It does not change that you are wife who has been abandoned by your husband and that you are mother to three boys, who desperately need their father because *all* children need their father.

The challenge for you, if I may be so unsolicitously bold, is for you to grow into an area of strength you never thought would have to – or wanted to. You have to – it’s been hard, it will continue to be but you have, it appears, an incredible resource of support and family standing right beside you – and an extended church family, from the sound of it. WOW. You have what so few other women who are, tragically, in the same place all over the world – use it and continue to be thankful for it.

God’s working some crazy-ass, confusing and difficult transcendent, cosmic plan in all this – there’s a bit of inchoate solace in that, grab for a few seconds every day, it will help.

Here’s what I feel I need to tell you – Dave will come home.

Until then, I hope, though, you finding ways to laugh and smile – your sons are taking notes there. Let them see you living more and more each day.

DAVE: I am a customer of yours. If you keep your database clean, you’ll see me in there for numerous purchases over the last few years.

You do very, very good work -and there’s a lot of area of further growth, improvement and excellence inside that work. You know it – you sense it – you feel it. That potential for ‘great work’ is latent inside you, not quite reached, waiting to stir up and transform others who will encounter it – and, as it goes in business, transform yourself.

You want to, sure, make you more money, become more well known, respected and lifted up by your peers.

It’s that ‘sin’ of doing your own thing that drives so many of entrepreneurs and small business people – to make an impact on others – and ourselves. It’s, also, something many good entrepreneurs quite fully reconcile which is why we never get clear there.

These ‘things of the earth’ who so greatly covet so quietly many times are, also, one of many Achilles Heels we need to recognize. It appears you tripped up here. It happens – but it’s never too late.

I’ve running my own business since 1994, on the net since ’96 – I’ve had great success and sold my share of millions in that time – but I’ve gotten know great failures and the loss of of too much money, too. Pain. My fair share of it.

Stay with me here, Dave.

I mention this because I’m in the process of building a new life as a business owner again – starting with almost nothing, as I did so many years ago.

Cool. (kinda) Not.

But it’s back to the source. The ashes of my past life are still floating to the ground as I build it back up in 2011. Some have felt sorry for me, customers, friends, family. “You had it all, you lost it – what happened?”. Answer: “Well, a lot of things but what’s clear is I have a lot of work to do on….’me'”.

I’m past the shame now. You are going to understand this someday soon – You just live inside it for a bit, push past it — and get back to work because it’s *who we are*.

There’s always a new you around the bend because we are redeemed in the gift of life itself. When you really understand that, there’s….freedom. Again.

Talk about ‘rock your day’.

Well, I’d love to talk to you about that, Dave. Anytime.

For me, like you, I had the support of my wife and children, at all times – in everything. In all things. My wife’s been there for 28 years living with…me. In all my less than awesomeness stuff. Without that, I would have failed ultimately on all levels. My wife empowered me to following a dream in 1994 – and dream it was. Launching a record label and music distribution company from mountains of Colorado – how crazy is that?

Crazy enough to work, full time in 9 months flat from a low-interest credit card(uh, not recommended in 2011, though!). But all things change – One of the many big lessons of the last five years.

Not like you, though, my family is still clearly in focus. My kids need their dad still – they’re so young still(we waited quite awhile to have kids, Dave). Speaking to my selfish needs, I need them and my wife. I don’t work well without them. The world would pull me in and I’d lose myself.

Dave, I get the temptations you took on and, it appears, came up short against.

That you have lost your family and are going through this without them made me weep this morning. Literally.

I’m a bit confused as to why but, hey, there you go.

It’s been ‘hell’, as a business owner, these last five years but I stuck it out(okay, let’s be honest, I had no choice), despite losing so much and now I’m coming back out on the other side, ‘moving on up’, to quote the great 70s show “The Jeffersons”. Lots of work to do. Stuff ‘n products to create.


I live inside this re-booting phase, by leveraging my experiences, my talents(which really took awhile to get clear on), using knowledge inputs from a few incredibly smart online business gurus and, in the mix of all it, some of your products.

So why all this talk about me? Well, you are connected to much of this.

You have been part of this process(and this year is quite successful , one of the best in many years) and it is why, I was so blown away to find out what has been going on in your life and it answered why there has been absolutely nothing of merit in 2011 from ‘your corner’.

So let me say a few things, feel free to haze and hate me for them. I’ll take them because I’m out of bounds with what society says is the way to proceed in these matters, I recognize that.

But I say these things as someone who respects your talents and does not want to see them wither(and you know, they will – get clarity on that because they already have…we are judged by outputs in our world, Dave and yours are next to nothing in 2011)….I’d like your work to still be part of what I’m building as few folks in the IM world(I’m in the music business, btw – not in the IM world) impress or move me to a centering place of implementation.

And, in my own selfish way, hope ‘n pray they may bring some levity, clarity and place of healthy action coming from a different business perspective you may have encountered so far.

These things are:

1. Thank You. Thank you for the strength following your dreams and…create…stuff. Good stuff. Really good stuff.

2. Notice I did not say ‘great’ stuff – because that occurs inside the process of growth as a small business owner when you’ve lost a lot, pushed through too much pain – and fought back. That…THAT…awaits you still, Dave. Listen to the guts of what I’m saying here – it’s something only crazy, freakin’ insane people that do the stuff that we do, can get.

You are up for it. Still. Kick that devil off your shoulder right now – you are up for it.

3. Yes, I don’t *know* you but I’ve been spent many, *many* hours listening to your voice in audios and reading through and implementing the fruits of your work, so I, actually, do have a bit of understanding of how your mind works to some small, modest level – but I have to say – and I’m not sure Anthony will allow this – but, Anthony, if so, please lighten up and roll with with it here……Dave, you’re being an douchebag. A huge one.

You know it, too. It’s time to just….stop.


Now, Dave – I’m a Christian. Like you. But I’m different there than most, too – Like You I sense.

I swear, drink tequila(and you find beer – my home town is a huge mecca for beer makers), get drunk a few times a year and am passionate about rock ‘n roll and Iggy Pop beyond words. I work in the world of rock ‘n roll, after all.

I come up short before my expectations for myself as a person, as a father, as a husband. Drives me bat-shit crazy, too. So, I’m no holy roller, threatening damnation for your sins, by any stretch. I’m believer in g-r-a-c-e and redemption. The kind that comes from yourself – and from outside of ourselves.

Like you, I struggle, though, with the balance of my faith and connection to God’s purpose for my life and…the world.

A sidebar comment and some question: These fellow A-level bloggers you party down with in Vegas and SXSW(Dude, I get SXSW, I’ve been to it 13 times since I since my company)? I know who they are – I’m in the Third Tribe, too since the beginning.

Where on earth are *they* right now in all of this? The so-called friends who you’ve been in the trenches the last few years? they ones you’ve done JVs with, making money with, running ideas by with? I did not sense a single even anonymous post here from any of them.

That’s just not right, man. It’s just not.

Sorry, gotta swear again – *Where the *fuck* are they for you, Dave?”

Are they telling you this is all this all right? To follow your gut and your passions to achieve more ‘n greater things that you could have without the shackles of responsibility? To build your own kingdom and not seek His?

Do they tell you it’s okay, it’s fine to just walk out and sever your marriage and connection to your children and sycophantically believe whatever you feed them?

Take a moment. Who’s…*standing*…by…*you*? Today? Who wants to, right now, spend hours and hours with you wanting to salve all your inner pain, confusion and troubles? Are they willing to do that, at a moment’s notice?

if not, you gotta really bad team you’ve outsourced your life to.

If you could only see into their souls and pain of empty-ness there….

You with me? If you are, guess what? You’re showing some spine, brother. Right On.

Stay with me for just a bit longer.

So, I experience, the last 3 hours of hearing ‘your story’ and I feel a bit more compassion and empathy and understanding than others in your Christian probably do.

I can hear them, too. “Dave’s going to hell if he does not change his wicked ways”.

You know. They don’t matter where you are at today. It’s just you – and your Creator. (it’s easier this way, anyway…)

But please hear what I say to you: God’s not done with you.

Not even close, Dave.

When you lose so much, you have even more than you could imagine to share with others. That is what is waiting for you.

Dude, it’s a helluva product, a ultra-cool weekend seminar and….well, if I have ideas, you do, too! ;-P

Come back – begin again.

One step is all it takes. Call. You know that number already you’ve thought about in the dark days of this lost, shitty year.

Of course you have your family and close friends ready to embrace you but – let me speak for a voice not seen here. A different one. One connected to people who have been your customers these past years:

WE are ready to have you return, too.

I offer my support and experiences of being a solopreneur for almost 2 decades to work it through. I’m easily found, if you want to find me.

I’m not hiding because I truly believe God’s plan is in motion, bringing you back with a new, powerful, massively impactful message for you new, higher calling.

Which brings me to….the last of my 4 comments.

4. I launch a new site on September 1st. It’s been one of the largest under-takings of my career and I’m 49. I’ve had a few quarter million dollar launches, too. This one is free, though! Free. I’m crazy with this obsession, Dave. Consumed. And it’s nowhere, where it needs to be still – but out into the world it will go. A shell of my dream – but it will begin its first evolutionary step.

Why mention this and talk about myself?

To have you identify that I understand some of where you are coming from. Two reasons:

1. I’ve spent three hours to write this when I should be working on this launch because my back IS against the wall. You get launches, you get creating new products, you get deadlines that fall apart despite your best efforts. We got to be driven. Driven and committed.

I *know* I’ve not wasted these hours going through this site and typing this, though – because….and, again, I’m not freakin’ holy roller, hear me loud, very loud – God is working.

It’s time to listen again.

2. I have a sense you are like me in many ways. Funny, from a guy who just called you an douchebag, right?

How? Well, I think you have a tendency to ‘do it all yourself’ and not better leverage the talents and strengths of others to make the process of creation easier. It’s not smart business but, man, is it hard to change. Very, very hard. (plus, there’s an lingering insecurity that we *can’t* do it, but that’s another subject for another time..)

I’m getting better, though – the hard way. I’ll help others, too – get better.

So will you.

It’s how we are wired, at the core, Dave – as entrepreneurs. To make people’s lives better and it’s why we are so driven and singular.

There’s a nasty downside that can come along with that and, sometimes our families suffer.

You need to own up for the price it’s had on your family. Today. In this moment, if yr up to it. Because, without them, you never would have gotten this far. You see *that*, don’t you?


Dave, you’ll be welcomed home with open arms. There’s a good story in the Bible about that, too. ;-P

Sometimes, our lives becomes embedded in the Truth, eh?

It’s okay, though, to fuck up. Huge. It just is.


Because, it’s part of our life’s calling from Him, Dave. We come up short. He’ll make it make sense, even though it does not now.

Let’s finish.

Here: Come on, man. *I* am a rocker. I make my living and support my family rocking, literally. You have a site, ‘’.

You’re *not* rocking it, right now. Not at all in 2011. Cold water in the face fact. Brutal one to admit. BUT, BUT you have the strength to just say ‘yes’ and look it and begin again.

I am a fan. I can believe in you because I believe in Him, like you do. Your view of your work that I have used in my business is unchanged by your actions.

How cool is THAT, Dave?

Think about it.

Start clawing back up – today.

We can still screw up, massively – but when we do good work as we move towards doing great work, the good stuff can stand on the power of who were, have been…and are going to become.

You are ready. So, when your raise your hand to God to say “Here I am, forgive me.”….speaking for me, well I’m ready to rock right alongside you because…brothers do that.

I have a pretty amazing collection of music – and strange, interesting life inside of it, too. So let’s rock sometime.

Bruce, a fan and supporter waiting

8 thoughts on “From Bruce Brodeen

  1. @BB ::

    I read that whole thing. While I certainly appreciate and agree with much of what you said … I think perhaps you’ve missed a huge part of the point.

    You and I have talked before right? I’m think I remember Rich Shefren was someone you were looking up too at the time … and here you are mentioning that you’ve purchased Dave’s “The Launch Coach” stuff.

    What is a “Launch Coach” Bruce? What is a “launch” for that matter?

    Had Dave had enough success online to justify taking your money to explain to you how you could succeed online?

    Dave doesn’t need fans or supporters or buyers … he needs to get a new job … and to forget all about this world of lies and darkness … where coaches coach coaches to coach coaches and people die in sweat lodges and abandon their children.

    “Third Tribe” … it doesn’t sound very innocent.

    Be careful to whom you give your mind.

  2. Yeah, Droid – we have talked before.

    You remember well or yr search strings are very powerful in yr blog- that was a long time ago!

    I touch base w/ everything you do every 3 weeks or so – hey, I’m a ‘fan’! Sorry, man – know how you hate that! ;-P

    First off, thanks for reading everything – understand, it’s to Dave, not a public thing but such is the nature of communication here….

    It’s a plea from a stranger to get a man to spine up and be a father again and, hopefully, husband, too. It’s worth the effort and time – even from a stranger, even if all that’s going on here comes up short(which I pray it won’t).

    Children need their dads and families need to fight hard to stay together – this is the focus w/ this family’s efforts…

    Second, I totally hear you – I do. (and did – listened to yr audio interview even from this week w/ Ryan – cool insight into things…) All I can do is judge by results that are *working* for me – and they are.

    I don’t give my mind away to anyone.. Years ago, I picked a few folks to ‘lean on’ and learn from. I was so busy managing a business that exploded on me that I woke up one day and realized I was off-track and had never sought properly help from other business owners who had been there, done that.

    Doing business and being responsible for your family, employees and clients – and not seeking input and insight from others is….negligent and will take you out at the knees, eventually. Doing so blindly to charlatans will do the same, as well. (or kill you, literally as w/ D-bag, ” the secret” James Ray….gawd, still sickens the soul…)

    Is buying anything online an act of personal negligence for you? Come on. I(and many others) invest in ‘information’ carefully(especially, the last few years) and with prudence. I know what I’m doing but I’m glad you are there w/ what you do…vigilance and personal responsibility have to mix with alongside the reality of so many of the bottom feeders.

    What do you suggest a business owner do with expanding a better understanding of what the biz owner is doing then?

    And, yes, Rich was one of 3 or so. I am a devotee of his, without hesitation. No apologies there…he saved my ass years ago. That’s a fact and I’m extremely grateful to him.

    With Dave’s products, they have always been *very* reasonably priced, easy to digest, easy to gain clarity and get moving in a direction of action – which matters, a lot. He’s got a gift there much as you don’t want to parse out any appreciation for…which is fine.

    I respect and appreciate that you have stepped up for so many voiceless and powerless folks out there – I am not one of them but I stay on guard and you are a tool alongside my own personal responsibility to stay that way.

    Anyway, this is not the place or format to engage on this but Droid, the silence from Dave’s blogging and JV partners is, yes, very, very wrong and disturbing…….feel free to contact me direct or on FB, though to continue…I’ll send you a box ‘o free tuneage w/ what I do, if yr interested…

  3. Dave abandoned us first. He stopped emailing, talking and responding to us.

    We’d recommend customers and they’d come back begging for help, because something technical happened with the order and they couldn’t get hold of Dave.

    We’d support Dave’s work but when it came to the crunch, he stopped responding.

    We arranged to meet him at Blogworld only to find his networking assistant had barely seen him for the whole event.

    Dave stopped talking to them for four months. And then they discovered that the reason he’d abandoned everyone was this.

    Dave stopped talking to us first. We havent reached out to him, but we also haven’t contributed to his downfall. That’s all we really can do.

    I reached out initially, but got no response. I’m not going to help someone that did a lot of bad things to his friends and those he outsourced to in the months following this. Those people have remained silent about how they were screwed over because they care for dave enough not to talk about it.

    I miss him and want him to come back, though, sans ittybiz

    1. Really glad to see a post representing more clarity and understanding from this side of the world Dave was working inside of the last few years….

  4. While I get that this is a family in crisis and that Dave is a TERRIBLE person to have done what he has done, this whole site seems just as damaging to the children. They are already going through the worst time of their lives. What is going to happen when they find all of this one day? How could reading all these communications to their absent father help in their healing?

    My Dad left in this type of manner when I was 16, was gone for only two weeks, then came back to the marriage/family, and my parents are still together. Obviously it ended well for all of us. I am now 38. The damage from this family struggle has been life-long. I have had to work really hard to forgive him for it and I think there are still lingering issues from all of it. I can say without a shadow of a doubt that if I had a website such as this one hanging out on the web, detailing my family’s pain over months and months it would only add to that pain. Every time they see these words it will bring it back fresh and new.

    He’s clearly not responding to this type of communication. It seems to me like all these pleas would only serve to drive him away further. Remember what it feels like when you’ve broken up with someone and they act very needy? Made you want to run further away, right?

    I know you’re a family in pain and I’m in pain for you. I think what he’s done is unforgivable and, as a mother, I cannot even fathom what those children must feel, let alone his wife. It just feels like what you’re doing here isn’t much better than what he does by ignoring his family both in life and online… You’ve just gone to the other extreme.

    I want to be clear that in no way am I saying this because I don’t think this jerk should be held accountable. He needs to be. I understand your intent, I truly do. I understand what it feels like to be a person who is in pain, reaching out to one of the most important people in my life and having them ignore me. I understand what it feels like to not understand their actions and want answers. I understand that’s what you all need.

    You’re fighting to control another person that you’re *never* going to gain control of. Only he can make the decision to come back and I honestly don’t think that this site and all of these pleas are going to help your case. He’s going to have to live with his decisions and he’s going to have to come to do the right thing on his own accord. I suspect, with every post, he just gets more and more angry, which may do more harm than talking him into doing what he *should* be doing.

    I also say this as a person who doesn’t know Dave. I have no affiliation, was not a customer, do not know the family. I’m just someone who happened on this site from something else I was reading.

    Doing what’s right by the kids is the most important thing in this scenario and this site definitely isn’t something they’re going to look back on with fond memories when their friends are sending them links or people are going online to research them and this pops up. You’re tying their names online to all this pain and their family’s dirty laundry.

    If your intent is to continue to damage him and his reputation and, consequently, his online business find another way. Bash him directly and keep the kids out of it, PLEASE. This makes me absolutely ache for them – in so many ways – as a 16 year old going through it and as a mother.

    Maybe you feel like this *is* for them, but as a person who has suffered something similar I can tell you this type of thing would have sent me over the edge and destroyed me. 22 years later, if there was a lingering reminder that anyone could find because it would come up with an internet search of my name… wow. Imagine what his 15 year old feels when he reads this… You’re making a judgement call about his and his brothers’ lives, something they’re too young to consent to. How do they feel about this site? How do they feel when you write about them and include their names?

    I urge you to respect those children, give them some privacy and figure out a way to communicate with him that isn’t airing all of their dirty laundry for the entire world to hear. They’ve been harmed enough.

    1. Dear K:

      Thanks for your comment, and your perspective. Indeed, I had considered all those factors you mentioned when creating this site, but at that point, my brother had abandoned his family, stopped answering our calls, stopped responding to our emails, and basically “went off the grid” and into hiding, so using the medium of the internet was the only resource I had left to try to communicate. It couldn’t get any worse. In essence, this site was a flare gun from the deck of the Titanic in the middle of the Atlantic.

      We feared (and still do) his possible use of drugs, a mental breakdown, and getting trapped in a cult-like circle that encouraged shutting off family, friends, and anyone “holding you back from your dreams”… I was pleading to his “inner man” as it were, and trying to get his peer group to encourage him to do the right thing. To their discredit, those closest to Dave in his business have done no such thing, and their silence is an affirmation of their guilt in supporting his behavior.

      I’ll try to answer most of your questions here…

      As for the kids finding this site one day, Dave’s eldest is well aware of this site and has been aware of it since Day One. I built it while sitting in their kitchen while my wife and I were ministering to the family as Dave had been missing / uncommunicative for over a month. David was MISSING. Together we poured our hearts out asking “Where is my brother” and “Where is my father” and “Where is my husband.”

      As for the younger children, Indeed, I don’t expect this site to run to infinity… this story and chapter in our lives will one day close and this site will have served its purpose. Whether as a grave marker or a monument, only time will tell. I don’t expect the site to be live when the other two come of age to be internet users. But, I do indeed want them to know that their uncle fought, sweated, cried, prayed, and did all he could to set their father right… to snatch him from the cliff he had just jumped off from… that I was not the brother that stood by idly and watched / let him just walk away. One movie we have enjoyed together is TRON, and the Hero character is quoted “I fight for the users.” One day, my nephews will know, and I can say, “I fought for you.”

      Referring to this site “Driving him further away” I could not conceive him being any further away then he was, noted above, and in essence “It can’t get any worse” so I don’t think this hurt our relationship in that regard – a last ditch effort. as mentioned, a flare in the middle of the Atlantic – hopefully, someone somewhere can help my brother before its too late, because he was on the run with no address, no communication, blowing tens of thousands of dollars away every month in what seemed to be a self destructive flare-out before some type of crash and burn.

      A reflection on Shame: Something I’ve been contemplating these last months when people comment on my “airing our dirty laundry”. In today’s society we for some reason have lost our sense of shame, from the Oval office to the home office. Shame is a very useful tool. It used to keep young teens from getting pregnant. It used to keep drunk fathers sober. It used to encourage men to open car doors and show esteem for their women so they wouldn’t be thought of as a cad who didn’t respect women. Shame used to encourage children to get good grades, and to behave in school, lest they be forced to wear the “cap of shame” in the corner of the classroom.

      For our politically correct society to declare shame a sin, and criticizing those who use it rightfully has led to a world of ills, and it is well established that the greatest is fathers abandoning their children. It is the single greatest threat to society today. Ask anyone in the black community today their opinion on what is has done not only to the past, but future generations of children in their community.

      Shame, however, used rightly, can bring someone to their senses, as it did in the parable of the Prodigal Son, where the son who left, lived wildly, one day saw his shame, came to his senses, and rejoined his family.

      That day too, remember, the fatted calf was killed, and a party was held with celebrating and rejoicing because the lost was found; and in a sense, the dead had come back to life;

      What my brother did was shameful. And he should indeed bear the full weight of that shame, for the outcome of shame and discipline is to bring one into repentance and restoration, that he may live a full and wonderful life. I will likewise celebrate when this site can one day come down but for a single page stating

      My brother has come home.

      Wow… that gives me pause… my heart swells, for what an incredible day that will be, and unlike the prodigal in the parable who got all indignant at the father for receiving his brother back, I will gladly join in the celebration. The lost, indeed, will have been found! David’s past will be an unpleasant memory, and I will treat David’s past sin as God treats mine, separating it as far as the East from the West. My brother will have come home.

      Repentance takes away the shame – the person has turned from their shame and now walks among the righteous. So whether this site exists or not, indeed, David is living a shameful existence, and in order to “bring him to his senses” he needs to feel that shame. Not letting him feel that shame, and letting him walk in it, is not love. It is fratricide.

      I indeed dream for that day of repentance to come. And though in your experience, a two-week lapse in judgement on your own father’s part has led to a lifetime of pain, should my brother come home, through God’s help, just as He has forgiven us through Christ, I relish the thought that we can all forgive him, fully, and likewise fully rejoice that the lost sheep has returned to the fold, and we can continue to celebrate our futures together.

      One more thing I will add – I have received a very long, honest email from one individual who informed me that this site saved his marriage – he was on the same track as Dave, and as a result of witnessing the pain and harm David has done, this man has recommitted himself to his proper priorities, and his wife still has a husband, and his children still have a father, and now, one that is even more committed to be the best husband and father he can be.

      I have received other emails, mostly from women, saying they wish their ex husbands had a brother who would have loved and pursued them when they strayed, that maybe their marriages would have held firm, and their children would not be bereft of a father in the home.

      So no, as painful as it has been to watch David travel this destructive path, and as toiling as it has been to try to love and pursue that lost sheep among the 99, I have no regrets, except possibly, as we all do in hindsight, that maybe I could have seen some ‘danger signs’ years earlier and maybe this never would have happened.

      God uses pain and suffering in ways we don’t understand to bring about ultimate good. Actions that ultimately, draw us to Him. Through our family’s experiences this last year, we have seen great work like the instances mentioned above, and way too many to mention here. And indeed, God gives grace to the humble, and comforts those who mourn and are in sorrow, as well as convict the conscience of the evildoer.

      Blessings to you…


  5. Bruce,

    That was an amazing post and I think someday Dave will thank you for writing it.


    Do you really think that anything on this post will come as *any* surprise to them?

    Do you think they don’t know everything posted here and seen much more?


    Personally, I think they would appreciate reading posts from people who their dad had made a difference for. And also reading that people agree that what he did is NOT OKAY.

    We might not stone adulterers anymore or make them wear a scarlet letter, but I don’t think a few posts of public censure are uncalled for.

    Sometimes things need to be said.

    As for the rest of your comment, there is nothing so bad in our life that good can’t come from.

    I’ve been through some pretty crappy stuff myself over the past couple of years, and while I would never wish for what I went through, I can honestly say that I am a better person because of it.

    It is how we respond to the tough things in life that build character and help us grow.

    If the crisis in your family when you were 16 still has an emotional hold on you, that is something you should consider focusing on resolving. Unforgiveness leads to bitterness and bitterness can ruin your life.

    God doesn’t tell us to forgive to give the other person a pass. He tells us to forgive so the offender doesn’t have control over our emotions and peace.

    There are some things that are so traumatic that you can never “get over it,” but you can get through it.

    This is what I’ve learned about forgiveness in my own experience:

    Forgiveness is an act of will, it is not a feeling. You may never “feel” towards the offender the way you did originally, but you can come to a place where their actions don’t have an emotional hold on you. It is a choice.

    You have to learn to give it to God. To give Him the pain, the anger, the resentment, as well as the responsibility for justice. Some things are truly impossible for us to forgive in our human nature.

    There may be people out there that have such a “higher conciousness” that they can forgive on their own, but I’m not one of them. There is no way I could forgive what I went through apart from God. There is just no way.

    Even with God’s help it was a process. I had to grow spiritually before I was able to. One thing that helped was praying for the person that wronged me, and I still do, every day.

    It’s not easy to forgive, but it is possible and you *can* come to a place where that situation doesn’t color the rest of your life.

  6. Bruce, just came across this early today thanks to the Droid. I’m so out of touch with all this Internet Marketing stuff these days (purposefully). It just lays heavy on a person’s heart…so much of the lifestyle is void of substance. I’m sorry for Dave, for his family, for his true friends, for his customers, for his partners. People lose their way, but as long as there’s life, there’s hope they may find their way back. I hope the efforts of his family accomplish that.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *